Home > Sex Toys, vibrators > Once you go black you can go back (to the ER.)

Once you go black you can go back (to the ER.)

Rascal™ Toys Ass Thumper

Rascal™ Toys Ass Thumper

This lower intestine massager comes to us from Rascal, Topco’s gay toy division. Due to it’s 10″ size it will never be my bottom bitch but it does have a few decent features. I like the nice bubbled texture and it’s got the kind of motor that will rattle a size queen’s fillings. So what’s the problem Chi Chi La Rue? No flanged base. NO FLANGED BASE, SHE SAID.

Butt Fuckery 101: Unless you plan on going spelunking, any inanimate object you stick up your ass needs a wide base. Damn, didn’t we all learn that in 3rd grade? See, your colon works a little bit like a vacuum. Use a regular non-flanged vibrator and you run the risk of hoovering it to Neverland Ranch. Think of it as your bumhole’s attempt at humor-only this little joke will leave you in “stitches”. Awww yah! Zing!


I'll be doing stand up at the next RNC convention.


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