Archive
Great-Grandmother’s Ol’ Trick Pony
Millicent allowed herself only three great passions: Needlepoint, racism and vigorous Horse-Action.
Whoop that trick.
- 10 by 2 inch blades on this Impala.
Reptile Love
There it is, a scaley centerfold laying there in the sun. Just look at that broad snout and those spiney osteroderms – what a tease.
Fancy a death roll?
Take me down to the Emerald City
Back in the 90’s HBO’s OZ was the most romantic thing on television. OZ: The roller-coaster relationship of Beecher and Keller, my hairy Romeo and Juliet. OZ: A delirious love romp through a concrete buttsex meadow. OZ: The greatest motherfucking love story ever told.
Shanks for the memories.
Just thinking about it gives me the chills, much like this 14 inch OZ Dildo from TSX Toys.
"Tobias, your ass belongs to me."
It’s during those quiet moments when I’m sipping on an International House Cafe Suisse Mocha and gazing out my bay window at a magnificent sunset that..you know.. I realize I’ve just Shillengered myself on 2 feet of latex and I should probably go to the ER. That’s when I really miss OZ.
Ready…OK!
Have I ever mentioned how much I love Natalie Dee?
Chernobyl Cha Cha
Bring your geiger counter and a lead-based condom.
Momtastic
Mother’s Day is coming. ~Sigh~ If only you could find her the perfect gift that combined her love of gigantic inseams and showing daddy who’s boss. If only.
Pleasurists #64
by Jen Dixon via modelmayhem
Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.
Did you miss Pleasurists #63? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #65? Be sure to read our submission guidelines and then you can use our submission form and submit it before Sunday February 7th at 11:59pm PST.
Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.
- Cupid’s Fun Factory Contest Deadline: February 10th @ 11:59pm.
- Vagazzle Your VaJayJay! Deadline: February 13th.
- Glass Plug Contest! Deadline: February 14th.
- Love is Back Deadline: February 14th @ 11:59 Eastern.
- Now’s Your Chance for a Second Valentine’s Day! Deadline: February 15th @ 11:00 am CST.
- Silver Bullet Giveaway Daedline: February 16th @ 11:59pm Eastern.
- Porn & Fleshlights Deadline: On Saturday nights each week in February.
Oh Sandy.
Let’s go way back to a time when John Travolta was this thing called a “sex symbol” and not the man-kissing canned ham you know today. What if Grease had been shot as a porn and Olivia Newton John was replaced with Sandy? And by “Sandy” I mean Sandy the beige pocket pal from Doc Johnson. Danny’s serenade to Sandy might have taken on a different tone.
A different tone indeed.
“Stranded at the porn shop
Feelin’ like a tool
Why won’t they change that “no returns” rule?
Oh Sandy..can’t you see I’m in misery
I wonder why-yi-yi your cho cho looks like
Sigmund Freud’s Goateeeeee…”
OH SANDY.
High Adventure on the Interwebs
Could you suggestively sway your dorsal fin for me? Oh that's hot.
Our little blog is a hotbed of weird. Seriously, this place is crawling with farm lubers, slobbering goons and dolphin sexers. Check out this list of of our top search engine terms and see if you don’t agree that I should probably wash the drapes.
- dolphin penis
- dolphin dildo
- dolphin doll sex
- barbi twins sex
- sideways vagina pictures
- slanted pussy
- dirtiest pussy
- celine dion hairy face
- Glory hole
- never had blow job
- farm lube
- dole banana dildo
- animal dildos
- worst sex doll
- coors light twins (Frat boys do surf the web when they aren’t throwing coors light cans at gay people.)
- paralysed jesus (Seriously, what the fuck does that even mean?)
Don’t you wish “dirtiest pussy” searcher would meet “Glory Hole” searcher in the comments section? That would be a fun love match.
Sex Toys That Suck 